Put Yourself Back on Your Priority List
by Meghan Williams
It sounds simple enough but the truth is, this can be challenging. After all, which self are we talking about? Me, the parent, the spouse, the child, the employer or employee? The average person wears so many hats in any given day, our rudimentary core self can oftentimes get lost in the shuffle. And what does this lead to? A lack of boundaries, personal space and an underlying resentment that we spend all our time doing for everyone but ourselves.
When your MO becomes being there for everyone else, you tend to suffer greatly. What you need is balance. You need to nourish yourself as much as you nourish those around you. A good way to start is with a simple daily practice that serves to put YOU back on your list of priorities. And keep you there!
1. Create space: And it doesn’t have to be a big, lavish one. Just find a space in your home that you can claim as your own. It can be a corner in the living room or I even have some clients that use their closet! Point is – keep the expectation realistic with what your life can deliver. And make sure everyone else in the house knows that your space is not to be disturbed.
2. Brand it: Make it your own! Leave your signature on it. Whether that’s a comfortable pillow that you just adore, your favorite flowers close by, a decorative throw over the chair or even an attractive mat to sit on. Or maybe it’s a motivational poster or picture that really speaks to your soul. Or some incense or a candle that you love to burn. Just find something that brings you some form of happiness every time you experience it.
3. Carve out the time: As much of a challenge as this may be, try to find some time. Start with 10 minutes. Just 10 minutes that you can make your own. No phones, no emails, no other people vying for your attention. Just you. And schedule it. Put it on your calendar and make it non-negotiable. Maybe it’s part of your morning routine to get your day off to a good start, or your evening routine to wind down mindfully. Or maybe, if you’re ready for some real momentum, you can do both.
4. Enjoy it: Now pick something. Anything that brings you joy or fulfillment. Maybe you have a piece of music that speaks to your soul? Or a book filled with wisdom and inspiration? Or a yoga practice that you never seem to find the time for anymore? Or if you have a meditation practice you’ve been dabbling with, even better. The only requirement is, it must be ALL about you. What fulfills you most at that moment in time. And, it should be ONLY you. No talking on the phone or scrolling Social Media. Just you, taking your time in your own space.
The ability to take time for yourself and put YOU as your top priority – even for just 10 minutes – will do wonders for your mental and physical health. It provides you with some personal space away from the demands of daily life and it rewires the cognitive patterns that so often resent your lack of time to indulge in your own needs, wants and desires. And the more you allow for fullness to be experienced in your inner world, the more your outer world will begin to mirror it back to you.