Reality Check

Do you ever think “I’ll do it tomorrow?”  And when tomorrow comes there just is not time? Or you decide it’s not that important or you just forget what it was you were going to do? Or you put it off until the last moment and get frustrated with yourself because now it’s taking up more time than if you had done it in the beginning?

Deciding that you want to make a change in your life and finding the commitment to do it is up to you. As I said Monday – commitment level will vary with the different stages of the process – It can be very high in the beginning and then depending on your success level and setbacks – remember failure is an illusion – commitment level can go up or down.  What I’ve found in my life is even though my energy level dips or I get scared or frustrated – the underlying commitment level must stay high.  The determination to put one foot in front of the next – no matter how hard must stay constant and high. Then you create momentum and success come more easily.  AND always celebrate every success especially the small ones!  You deserve success and celebration.  Changing yourself is no small feat!

Here is the next step in finding your greatness.  I have a reality check for you. On a piece of paper write down the year 2018 – remember when you physically write something in influences your subconscious to make a change.  Next, to the date write your current age.  Now go back 15 years and write the date 2003 and your age then.  I am 69 and in 2003 I was 54.  Just considering my age now and 15 years ago is a reality check for me. 

             What were your goals in 2003?  Did you accomplish them?  What forces interfered with you accomplishing your goals? 

             For me personally – we moved to Dallas in 2001 when my husband took a new job – We had the Dot com crash which affected my ability to get a job as a graphic artist, so I took a job with a recruiting firm.  After 3 years of that I opened my own recruiting firm. In 2006 my husband retired and got involved with a business that was geared to the Real Estate market.  In 2008-2009 the real estate market crashed as did the banks.  His business failed and mine hit a lull.  Then I lost both of my parents, closed my recruiting business and opened another and wrote a book – all in 15 years!  I had not planned any of that – not even thought about those things as possibilities! 

The key to accomplishing your goals is not about the myriad of outside influences, it’s about how YOU react to those influences and how intent you are in accomplishing your goals and getting what you want out of life.

Now let’s look at the future:  On your paper write the date for 15 years from now – 2033 and next to it write down the age you will be at that time.  I will be 84.  That almost seem impossible!  And here is the reality check – What do you want to accomplish in the next 15 years? What do you want for your children?  There will be lots of outside influences – how are you going to deal with them?  AND still find your greatness?  If you don’t pan a positive future for yourself – life will just happen, circumstance will take over and you will be 15 years down the road and wonder – like I did – where did all the time go and what happened to your dreams!

While we are thinking about our past and future, it’s important to be aware and learn from your past – the good and the bad.  What was positive, use those things to create a better future and learn from the negative things and do things differently.  If you can learn from the past what didn’t work and reframe that, it then becomes a powerful tool for you to use.  Failure is an illusion and learning from your past mistakes is a powerful tool in building your greatness.

Another thing we can learn from the reality check exercise is about anticipating what comes next.  Especially when you start a project in your business or personal life, stop and think what you want the results to be, build that structure anticipating things that could happen.  It’s impossible to figure it all out, but if you anticipate things that could go wrong you can figure out how to deal with them before they become critical and end the project before it’s time.

It’s always nice to think about reinventing yourself – finding your greatness – But greatness is about the journey of discovering who you are – and it’s a very powerful journey – You will discover how very amazing you are – how resilient you are – your many gifts and talents.  You will find new friends and strengthen current relationships or let them go.  You will feel alive – maybe for the first time – and you will know yourself.

I have another list of questions for you to consider:

•        Do you struggle to find balance between your fitness needs, personal needs, life tasks, social life and work? If yes, when time is tight, which is the first area you cut down on?

•        What do you find most challenging in life (relationships, work, money, family, etc.)?

•        What is more challenging for you, balance or discipline?

•        What areas would you like to see healing/growth in?

•        What are some of the things that you feel limit you in growth or block you from living to your fullest ability?

•        What are you most passionate about in life? Do you feel that you are living your purpose?

•        What would you like to feel or be different, better or more in your life?

•        What would you like to have, be or do more in your life?

•        What do you think is the most beautiful or positive thing about the world? The worst?

•        What are you most grateful for in your life?

•        When you have had a long day and really need to ‘recharge’ would you choose to be home and have some alone time or go out and socially interact?

•        When you experience stress, negative feelings and or emotions what do you typically do to deal with them? Or what do you do to avoid feeling uncomfortable? How do you escape or process them (please list both positive and negative ways you do this)?



So welcome to the journey of self-discovery and greatness. 

The Fifth Quality of Goal Achievement

Does making goals really work?  Yes, you may say – I made a goal to lose 20 lbs. and I did! Or I made a goal to get 5 new clients last month and I did!  On the other hand, there will be equally as many people who set the same kinds of goals and do not accomplish them.

Does that mean goal setting works for some and not for others?  If so, why not?  What’s the secret?

Here are 5 key points in making effective goals.

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